Will somebody please open a window, anyone I am just asking for assistance? Almost 4 years ago something strange happened to me. One morning I woke up, I was in Southern California trying to complete jobs for my old clients and I was completely confused. I was unable to initiate speech and could barely answer questions. I could not put the correct name to devices that I had been working with for at least a decade.

Since I was there to work I tried my best to just carry on like nothing was wrong, I went on several jobs and finished some despite my diminished capacity, I actually had to resort to technical assistance and let others perform the services I was there to provide.

Just recently I had an additional MRI and EEG and it seems that some time ago I had some kind of traumatic event similar to a stroke. It was limited to the part of my brain that regulates speech and visual memories. I suppose I should be grateful, I have had older members of my family suffer the after effects of a stroke with the worst being 50% paralysis, strange drooping of one whole side of the face and the inability to move one arm and leg.

I guess I should be grateful. I could have been paralyzed or dead and despite the name I really don’t think that the dead are grateful. At least I can confirm that I was not imaging things or gone completely mental, aside from the fact that the damage was in my brain. This does explain a lot, I have been deteriorating since then but I never would have done anything like this blog before.

I got better but I was different, a little slower, a little dumber, and I sometime wish I had a delay on what the fuck comes out of my mouth, seriously folks I even look over prior posts and can not imagine who posted these items. I mean aside from putting up my favorite images and pictures the stories I have posted are mostly true or at least as accurate as I can remember them. Since most of the events are highly embarrassing I would have at least hesitated before I put the down in black and white and sometimes in color.

I am felling better and hope to attend the fabulous spanking event Texas All-State Spanking Party and have hopes that it will be an awesome time. I hope to report about that in a later post.



This entry was posted in Being Cranky, Mostly true life experience. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to A DOOR CLOSES

  1. web-ed says:

    As I remember it, I believed at the time of your earlier post that you had had a stroke based on your description of what had happened. I’m glad you’ve had further tests that confirm this, but I’m not convinced the damage was limited to the parts of the brain controlling speech and visual memories. There is some indication your self-control has been affected also, and that can’t be explained by damage to Broca’s area or the visual cortex. Make sure you have a top-flight neurologist working on the case, and be sure to ask if any therapy is available that could restore any part of what has been lost.

    And good luck at the Texas All-State Spanking Party!

    • Hi Ed

      I can’t believe that you are still here, but I think you are spot on as usual. I mean too much of anything is not necessarily a good thing. Especially self control. Without losing some of those inhibitions I wouldn’t have even considered sharing my favorite things or writing down some of the things I have never shared with anyone. I never considered how repressed I was until I stopped caring what others might think now I wonder how I could have possibly functioned constantly walking on broken glass. At least I postponed signing off and have been feeling that there might be some chances left for me.


  2. Dave Wolfe says:

    Hi, CS!

    I’m delighted to read that you have improved; this sort of thing runs in my family, too. We’ve spent the last year and a half dealing with my father’s debilitating stroke. My mother has dementia. My oldest niece suffered brain damage in a car wreck when she was a little girl, and a writer friend of mine had a brain seizure brought on by the wrong drug administered in the emergency room.

    Our brains are marvelously complex, and it’s a shock when something we’ve been able to take for granted goes awry. Web-Ed is right, there are lots of therapies that can help “write new pathways.”

    My very best to you.

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